Updated: FUCK, i'm not going to sorry for myself

December at the moment (NL50 only) - Yes, at the moment, because I'm going to stack some fucking fish from today!

1st of all I'm going back to my A-game because that's the key!

Results

122.2
 

New BR

1944.19

My very first Rush Day

The last couple of weeks weren’t as good as I’d like to at NL50. I lost a little confidence in my game. You know since I’m full time and need to cash out monthly the pressure is there and hard to avoid it.

Anyway, when my wife is here all day long (weekends and holydays) it’s hard to find perfect time to play. She doesn’t want to disturb me but she can’t be as quiet as I need to. This is not her fault at all, so no hard feelings.

I tried this rush game on Full Tilt yesterday. There was a little fear since my friend lost a lot there a few days ago. To minimize the variance and the risk I chose NL10 FR for my first shot.

Some thoughts:

• ftp-s are coming as fast (in time) as at NL50 SH regular games - 2tabling both
• at NL10 the average opponent is very bad and easy to play against
• in my experience in FR rush games there are not too many reasons to steal and save the blinds with questionable hands or any two: I mean with quick fold I can easily got another 3 or 4 hands in a couple of sec and that seems much better for me than waiting for my turn on the BTN or on the CO with marginal or worse hands
• so I think a tight but fast game is the best choice in this game at this level – SH or higher level must be different I’m sure
• because the game is fast and I had as many hands in one day as in one week at NL50 I had a lot of good cards, it’s easy to waiting for them and avoid risky plays
• this game is fun – I’ve laughed a lot about it, even when half (or less) stacker got lucky vs me a few times which is not my normal reaction at NL50 :-)
• without table and seat selections, stats, game flows and histories this game is a little bit stupid, level 1 or maximum level 2
• danger: rush poker is like a narcotic, hard to finish it when you are in rush. you know, just one more hand! and one more and one more and…

Okay my sample size is very little, only one day and 3296 hands. My thought could be different after a bigger one. We’ll see. And I’m sure that a downswing can hurts a lot so the risk is there, especially for an emotion (pathetic :-P) type of guy like me.

My hourly win rate was much better than an average at NL10 I think – for me of course
 

Graph from yesterday

 
And some stats

My plan is to play rush when I have less time or conditions are not optimal, that means usually weekends and play my standard game on my working days. I need to be careful with this rush game because I don’t want to change my main game and be a level 1 thinking player again.

Results

FT:  53.14

BR

FT: 2044.24

Such a perfect day

Looks like I have real problems here...

New BR

FT: 1991.10

Unacceptable

I already had 2 sessions today. The 1st one was bad luck, the 2nd one was pure bad play. And this is unacceptable. I don’t have any time and money to play like I’m playing in the last couple of weeks.
Sometimes I feel that I’m just waiting for someone who will help me out of this and show me the way. Then I feel that someone let me down. But that’s not true. I’m the only one who can get out from this shit because this is only my problem. And I try, I try, I try and try…

Yesterday I watched the group’s videos over again. I felt that I got it. I had a good 1st session then a blind one after. Today is the same. I don’t know where did I left myself and what I was learning so hard but since I’m alone again the old braindead rotyi is back. And I hate him. :-(

 

Results

68.65

Rakeback

FT: 22.43
 

New BR

FT: 2088.05

I killed my own game last night

Look at the wosd line!

 

I had a table where I lost myself. I realized that I’m in trouble but I couldn’t quit. I don’t know why…

SB: 66/30/44
BB: 47/20/26
UTG: 21/15/23
MP: 57/31/39
CO: 19/14/28
BTN: me

Looks like a goldmine but was a real disaster for me. I had a lot of broadways and small-middle pair type of hands.

Results

28.00

New BR

FT: 2134.27

November

I had few targets for November:

• 22nd consecutive iron man moth (iron level): got it
• winning month: got it
• keep learning: got it
• find some new leaks in my game: fail
• working on my 4 step thought process: not enough
• working on my aggression: fail

Overall I’m not happy with my work at this time. I had a very busy month because of some family issues but laziness is not acceptable in my case. I’m still far from a good winning player. I really miss the group coaching sessions. Those were the biggest impacts in my “poker carrier”. I need to find a solution for this problem asap.

Here is my November

I was playing more than 88 hours (learning another 90 or so), but my hourly earnings drop down dramatically after my second down swing.

Graph

Stats

Targets for December

• I need to learn how to use HEM filters – I’m still bad in that
• I need to find a new group (2+2 or CR) where I can work with others daily
• I don’t want to quit from FLAG but we have to be more constructive
• keep learning
• find some new leaks in my game
• working on my 4 step thought process
• working on my aggression
• 23rd consecutive iron man moth (iron level)
• winning month
• learning and playing rush poker too

Special targets for next January-February

• shot at NL100
• buy a couple of 1 on 1 coaching sessions from Steve – before I move up and after my first 10k hands or so at NL100

Targets for the 2nd part of 2011

• move up to NL200 – if I can do that and win at least few buy ins monthly then I’ll have no more money problems in this country

BR

2138.47

Best NL50 day ever

Here is the graph since my worst day

Today is my best day at NL50 at the moment

Results

FT:  154.90

BR

FT: 2145.51

Worst day ever

That wasn't funny at all

God, it hurts...

I never ever lost this much a day.There were set vs straigh, full house vs better full house. I doubled up short stackers with AK and AQ. 

I had two sessions today. In the first one I played badly. I was too passive and I don't know why. I lost a buy in which is very good with that play. The 2nd one is interesting. I think I was playing good at this time. I just couldn't win. In 223 hands my biggest win was $4.20. That's all. And I payed off everybody. Maybe this one was just a day like that when there is nothing you can do about it at all. I don't know.

Almost 5 buy in. Nice.

NL50 all time - overview

I've already played a decent amount of hours and hands at this level so I'd like to show you some stats about it.

First of all as you know I was a long time looser (almost break even) player at NL25. Thanks for Steve and the Flag Group now I'm a consistent winner at NL50. Yes, there are still a lot of room to be better but I'm happy with my develpoment. My hourly win rate is not that bad in this country.

As I said there are still so many things that I need to learn and change in my game. My aggression is far from the optimal - especially the 3 and 4bets.

My mental skills are better as well than before but I still have some problems with variance. I mean the best option for me is the QUIT when things start to go to the wrong direction. When it happens I have to shout and say some dirty words, take a deep breath, hug and kiss my wife (if she is here) then everything is ok and I can fight back.

Rollercoaster? Yes. But on the better side of the X axis.

Fuck You

Yes, fuck you all lucky bastards.

Damn, I was up so much, then AK vs AA pre, AA vs JJ set flop ai, nut flush vs rivered FH in a row... now I'm down so much. Of course I was deeper than 100BB all the time.

I know, I know, that's poker baby. I just quit a little bit before I do any stupid mistakes at the tables. I'll comming back later.

So one more time: FUCK YOU

Before I forget it: Fuck You Full Tilt as well

* Edit: lol, one more AA ai lost tonight. This time vs K5o. We went all in on a 45Jr flop. Brilliant.

Anyway, I won back some dollars. And yes, this site still can fuck off...

Good night!

I’m tired...

I watched a couple of very good videos today (one from Steve and one from Nikachu). I reviewed my last session and tried to find those hands where I didn’t win as much as I should be. I had a long-long week and I didn’t sleep enough so this is the day.

I take a day off, because I really need to reenergize myself. I’ll sleep tonight like a baby...

Here is my highest BR ever

Yes, I had few cash outs already so it could be more... Anyway, I’ll cash out tomorrow. I’d like to leave about $2100 there – a hundred more than before. And I’ll leave another hundred there next time. My plan is to have a $2500 basic BR. If I reach that, I’ll take a shot at NL100. Just one buyin shot. It worked last time so why not?

Time for cash out...

My downswing is just a bad memory now

Results

FT:  119.65

BR

FT: 2424.04

Jeff Dunham is a genius

 

Rollercoaster day

No comment

Results

FT:  10.10

BR

FT: 2304.39

Here comes the Sun

I think when the variance fuck with you you just need to realize that you’re playing the right way. The challenging part is not changing what you believe in because it’s not working. You’ve got to keep pushing it because you know it’s worked in the past and know it’s going to work.

Here is this month so far:

Results

FT:  63.25

BR

FT: 2260.24

Keep on working

It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog
It's been a hard day's night, I should be sleeping like a log
But when I get home to you I find the things that you do
Will make me feel alright

You know I work all day to get you money to buy you things
And it's worth it just to hear you say you're gonna give me everything
So why on earth should I moan, 'cause when I get you alone
You know I feel alright
When I'm home everything seems to be right
When I'm home feeling you holding me tight, It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog
It's been a hard day's night, I should be sleeping like a log
But when I get home to you I find the things that you do
Will make me feel alright

Owwww

So why on earth should I moan, 'cause when I get you alone
You know I feel alright
When I'm home everything seems to be right
When I'm home feeling you holding me tight, oh through the night, yeah

It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog
It's been a hard day's night, I should be sleeping like a log
But when I get home to you I find the things that you do
Will make me feel alright
You know I feel alright
You know I feel alright...

Results

FT:  43.80

BR

FT: 2039.70

Winning day at least

After 4.33 Hrs and 750 hands

Sooner or later I'll win huge pots. I know :-)

Results

FT:  4.75

New BR

FT: 1995.90

Keep working

I had a little loosing streak which means 3 days and 6.5 buy ins. I hope that it’s over.

I played a 2 hours long session today, close to 400 hands. There was nothing huge, just a nice quiet game. The biggest win was $12.40 and the other side’s top hand means $10 loss (4bet/fold pre). But it’s okay, I was happy with my game.

Downswing

Working day

Results

FT:  28.55

BR

FT: 2001.15

This hand is worth a note

Thanks Mr

http://weaktight.com/2885547

Opponent is 33/24/40 - after 56 hands.

Results

FT:  12.85

BR

FT: 2089.40

I'm back on track

I was out for a few days but still playing from my laptop. But I had no time to blogging, writing mails etc.

I had ups and downs in the last couple of weeks. Yesterday was a huge down thanks for the variance. Today is down yet as well but much more interesting.

I’ll show you two fresh hands from my session where I lost a lot but I think I played them good. Funny how my weak skills saved my ass from these situations in the past :-) I’m sure I was folding the 1st one pre flop and give up the 2nd on the flop.

1st  http://weaktight.com/2882998

Opponent is 27/27 after 53 hand.

Agg is 17% - 33% F (9), 0% T (5), 0% R (4)  - looks like a real 1bm now but I didn't have these many hands about him at the time.

His 3b is 14%.

This was my 10th hand at this table, I played only 2 of them and won both. The 1st pre flop, the 2nd (which was right before this) on the flop with a CB.

I 4bet here to build dynamics vs him. He called me from oop so I put him on a range like this: TT+, AQs+, AKo. I have 40% eq vs this range on this flop. After he check/raise shoved me I cut his range a little bit to this: TT+, AsKs. My eq is still 32% and I need only 24.8% to be even, so I must to call this imo.

We don’t have any history so his hand is really surprise me. If he shoves with it pre that’s okay, but calling a 4bet with QJs fro out of position? Why? And he seems to be a reg not a fish.


2nd http://weaktight.com/2883076

Opponent is 27/23/45 after 44 hands (5 tabling)

I raise because I want to be HU ip and I don’t like to be squeezed from one of those blinds. I chose the TBL (tiny barrel line) post flop vs him. I really like this river I think it’s a perfect card for a 3rd barrel. And that’s the only way for me to win this pot. If I’m right he will fold his pairs like 99, TT, maybe (just maybe) QQ and a Jack (except KJ). I bet a little bit too much on the river but I really wanted to bet out any Jack from his hand.

Anyway, this hand is another surprise for me. He is a reg, there is no history between us either. After my session I checked him out on PTR. He is coming down from higher stakes (NL200-NL400) so maybe this is a standard play there I don’t know. I didn’t see any NL50 reg before who check/calls down my 3barrels with a medium pair on this board.

Nothing else happened, so here the 1st session’s graph:

Results

FT:  96.90

New BR

FT: 2105

Stop loosing

Too many loosing session in a row start to bore me so I stop it yesterday and won again. This is much better. My next plan is a winning streak :-)

Results

FT:  64.80

BR

FT: 2096.64